Fairy Tales Do Come True

It was a complete complex feeling. I feel like I been complaining very much in the relationship - " Guilty" I feel like I been very emotional in handling conflict. I tend to victimize myself. - FML I feel like it has reach the top of my bottle - " Angry" I feel like I don't deserve to be ignored when i express my feeling, yet, I still being ignored - "Disappointed"  I feel like I am not being understand by someone who called him honey - " Hurtful" I feel like I am not perfect enough to be with him - " Sad" All the mixed and complex feelings rushed in my mind, my heart and my emotion totally out of control. I shoo out all my feelings by typing it out to show how angry, how hurt, how dissapointed, how sad I am. But i realised, it was merely on my side emotion, because after typing sooo much, I was being totally ignored. That make me even hurt and dissapointed. To a certain extend that I wish i could put a fullstop to

"黑色，它不是冷漠，反而是一種保護色，遮蔽所有脆弱。 黑暗中所流的黑色眼淚不會被看見，悲傷也唯有留給自己… ‘’ Life is fragile. We know that fact, but it not going to affect any of us at any point of time until something trigger. The passing on of Aloysius Pang do wake me up from the slumber life that I have been living in. It does makes me realised that :- Life is so unpredictable, at this moment, this second, we are healthy, but no guarantee that the next second, whats going to happen (he been texting his gf, sending photos of himself to the gf, but god knows, next day, he suffered serious injuries and have to fight with it for 3 days until he return to heaven to be the brightest angel). To me, it is much easier to accept it when it is due to sickness. At least, you are given the warning and time to express what in your mind to your love one. The love story of aloysius and Jiaqi has been the highlight of this whole incident. Viewing Jiaqi's Instagram's stories, it broke my heart. Imagining myself i

The previous post was full of negative vibes and thus he gave me a thumb down! So today I am going to have a post with all the positive vibes to make his Friday more cheerful and happy. I been telling him that I am his happy pills when he is sad / down; im also his heal pill when he is sick; Im also his everything pills. Each time when im with him, I tend to talk a lot, LITERALLY A LOT. I can talk to him about everything from the sky to the ground. We will also laugh like mad each time when I made joke, or vice versa. I believe we enjoy the existence of each other? One of my friend share with me a article and the title is “when is the right time to get marry?”. Personally I do think that the right time is when both of us have been so familiar with each other and we have shown each other the ugly truth. He knew how disgusting am I and so am I. *hinting* I love the fact that he will accompany me to walk around the mall with no purpose, but mostly will end up with a purpose of b

There are certain point of time that I feel like I am so fed up with him. Each time when I am unhappy, I will throw tantrum at him. I will show him my black face, I will not talk to him, and worse is I dont give him face. LOL! After a year being together, we have been in this mode whereby when I am angry, he will just keep quiet. However, sometime I do feel like "why dont you pujuk me?" but sometime i will also dont give him face, when he pujuk me, I will say "shut up" / "go away". LOL which make both of us so awkward. But each time when he unhappy, i will be the one who angry at him. I will tell him "how can you do this to me?" "why you so blur?" "why you this?" "why you that?" So at the end of the day, he has to appologize, no matter he is of the correct side or wrong side. At that point of time where I will burst everything out then he will be the humble one who blame everything at himself. Heheee.. #win.

I always asked him random questions when he fetch me back home.  So today, I’m going to answer those QnA instead.  The most common question that I asked. I believe I asked like more than 3 times before?  Do u ever imagine ur life if u never met me?  Hmm, life will be pretty routine? Work-home-tv-sleep and repeat. When I’m sad I will just cry and will keep memerizing my past relationship?  Do u ever imagine that both of us will be together? NEVER!  As I said before, I told myself that guy younger than me are going to suffer with me lol. He don’t attract my attention at all before this and I find that he is too shy!  Do u think that we will last long?  I dare not say anything but I hope we will. but we don’t know what will happen in the future  Tbh, I’m really thankful that he is such a wonderful guy who can tolerate almost everything about me, except once that he raise his voice over me. Hmp! 

It been a year of knowing him. Everything seem to be like "eh, the same day last year... this was what happen.." Remember back then the 1st time we chat (like officially) was right after his admission to bar. I texted him "congratz" and that's how we started everything. It was May 2017 . It was mother's day! He has family gathering at KTV. He recorded some videos for me to watch. tbh, at that time, i actually already off light and watching tv while waiting time to sleep. Remember it was around 11+? (yea, i slept early last time). He asked me at the same day "what time normally u sleep". instead of telling him "actually i should have slept by this time", i replied "it depends". HAHAH. die die must tell him as if i dont purposely stay up to chat with him. :P and May 2018, Mother's Day . I went to their family gathering with his maternal side at machap. it was 20.5.2018. He purposely bought me a cup of no sugar milk